Friday 28 October 2011

Rejection

I found out today that I will not have a chance at MBBS at Adelaide Uni today.

This is kind of becoming routine now, getting so excited that interview offers are finally being released then feeling defeated to find that you didn't get one. Even though I have expected it every time it has happened, it hasn't made it any less disheartening.

As it stands now, 50% of my chances at medicine are gone. I should find out about the JMP soon and UNSW soon too, and JCU at the end of next month. I still have this paranoia that I wont get an interview at JCU because there will be some tiny mistake with my application...

All I really want is an interview. I think I could do well, because I truly want to do medicine. It still sickens me to think that medical schools accept people who are either doing it because their parents want them to, or for the money or the ever so illusive 'prestige'. What is even worse is that some of these people are so good they manage to make it through the interviews to become Doctors.

Although I don't really think of these people as real doctors. Yes they have the title, and their medical knowledge may be second to none, but they aren't really a 'doctor'. I prefer to refer to these people as Medically trained robots, perfect in their knowledge, and often perfect in their treatment, but with the personality and empathy of well, a robot.

Anyway thats my thoughts for the night, must go force myself to study for the last 3 HSC exams, even though it's the last thing I want to do.

Thursday 20 October 2011

Another Setback.

Just got an email then telling me I didn't get an interview for Monash. Also my UMAT was too low to be able to apply for their Dean's Rural List as well.

So that's 2/6 chances at Medicine gone, and I'm expecting similar outcomes for 3/4 of the chances that remain.

Wednesday 19 October 2011

One of the most useless things in my life is over.

English.

The bane of any HSC student, or any year 12 student for that matter. Having completed Paper 2 of the HSC today it now means that this useless part of my schooling is now done. Finished. Finis. Klaar. ZavrÅ¡en.
You get the picture.


And so what does this mean? Never again will I have to read things into a text that just aren't there. Never will I need to collect related material. Never will I have to analyse the ways in which perspectives are represented within texts. Or to take a leaf out of paper 2 today, never will I have to answer questions like "In the context of your critical study, to what extent does your response to the closing scenes of Hamlet inform your judgement of this play as a whole?". Ergh.


The past 6 years of doing English as a formal subject does not really seem to have taught me anything useful. At least the useful stuff probably could have been compressed into one semester....

I will however, concede that English has taught me one thing, and that is to not accept everything the media would have us belive. Recently, after studying the conflicting perspectives module I have picked up on so much bias in the media it's not funny. Is there any news source in Australia that doesn't sit firmly on the right wing?

As you can tell I am running out of things to post about at the moment. Nothing interesting has happened in relation to medicine recently, still waiting on interview notifications which may or may not come.

Bye for now.

Saturday 15 October 2011

4360 Minutes

Doesn't seem like long does it, thats how long it is until the first HSC exam for me starts - English Paper 1.

It is a strange time right now, I've never been very good at studying for English, it's just such a hard thing to do. I've exhausted all possible practices I can do and so all I can really do now is know the content, which essentially means being able to drag random quotes out of the depths of my brain.
It still doesn't feel like it, but in 4357 minutes the past 13 year chapter of my life begins to come to an end. 13 years of knowing school was always still there to go back to, knowing that holidays were only short lived, that familiar daily routine, is finally coming to it's ultimate end.

And so at 12:30pm on November 4th, it will end. I will wake up on November 5th, and know that there is nothing. This isn't a short lived holiday. The routine is over.

But even so, this isn't the final chapter of course. If I start medicine next year, it will only be the beginning. 6 years at Uni, followed by internship then attempting to specialise, could easily lead me to another 13 years before I am fully qualified. Does this worry me? Not at all.

A while ago when I was still tossing up between doing med or something shorter, I thought of a lot of the pros and cons for each. You only get one life (At this stage anyway.....) and lets say for argument's sake that I live 85 years. Also for arguments sake, lets say that I spend 15 years studying medicine and specialising to be fully qualified (In reality it would probably be longer). Add that onto the 13 years of schooling and that is 28 years of straight learning (Granted some of it is paid though). So that makes up 34% of my life (Once again assuming I live to 85).

It was when I worked out this statistic some time ago that I started to have doubts about medicine. I could just as easily do a 4 year undergrad degree and go straight into some job and be fully qualified for it, so to speak, and this would be around 20% of my life. A big difference.

But then I realised that seeing as I've somehow become set on Medicine, I don't think I could manage another field. My biggest fear would be going into a path not in the medical field, and someday, 40 years down the track I sit down and it hits me "I really should have done Medicine". By then it would probably be too late.

What I'm really trying to get at is we only get one life, and you're doing it wrong if you look back on your life as it's coming to a close and regret what you have spent your life doing.


Well anyway thats my attempt at being inspirational for the morning. I don't actually have much to post about now, as nothing interesting has really been happening. I did however receive an email from UWS saying that I would not be getting an interview. So that is one chance at Med that I can cross off the list.

I probably should go and get into a fun filled day of English study now. 4338 Minutes....

Bye for now.

Saturday 8 October 2011

The HSC grows closer....

I've come to realise that at the moment I don't actually have many things to post about, nothing interesting relating to Uni has eventuated at the moment, apart from JCU receiving my application...
There is a bit over a week to English Paper 1, and somehow motivation has hit rock bottom. I'm so close to finishing I can almost taste it, and I know that with my ATAR estimates I have a half decent chance at JCU med. But somehow that still doesn't shock me into being motivated, and instead I sit around and procrastinate, doing things like updating this blog, and looking at the course info for my backup plan and mentally telling myself I would still enjoy it.....

I guess it is hard to be motivated to study something you don't enjoy, or which is so far removed from the real world E.G. English.. My Physics teacher has a saying, everything must obey the laws of Physics.... Except the HSC Physics syllabus.....

So what has happened recently that is of any worth.... This leads me to one thing in particular, the untimely death of Steve Jobs. It is quite hard to believe that one businessman could be so influential in the Western World today. Steve apparently lost his fight with a rare form of pancreatic cancer on Wednesday this week. The saddest part of it is seeing how it tore him to pieces, before ultimately killing him. You only have to look at recent photos of him to see how unwell he really was.

This comic sums it up:

Eternal flame: There's always the hope that if you sit and watch for long enough, the beachball will vanish and the thing it interrupted will return.
Source: xkcd



This can just show how cancer can absolutely tear someone apart and destroy them. I have to say that seeing people having to live with cancer is one of the things that have pushed me to want to study medicine. While personally no one in my family has been affected by it, I have seen people I know suffer. One example, the assistant year advisor at my year 10 school. I left that school in year 10, and then she was 100% ok, a lovely person, just going about her life with no worries. Then, at relay for life this year I saw her again for the first time since year 10, I was shocked into being speechless. She was barely recognizable. It is terrible to see how in just 2 short years someones life can be absolutely turned upside down and changed forever.

So anyway, thats all I can think of to post at the moment. If anyone has some insanely motivating statements feel free to leave them in the comments :)

Bye for now.